Few things in life are as steeped in pomp and ceremony as a wedding. And as anyone who’s ever planned one knows, there’s plenty of opinions about what you “must” do and what you “must” have. From something blue to garter tosses, many of these traditions have almost morphed into wedding “rules”. But there’s nothing legally essential about them, which means you can happily ignore them as you plan your big day your way. Here’s 10 myth busters to get you started.
The bride must wear white
This is probably the biggest wedding myth of all time. And apparently, it traces back to Queen Victoria who chose the colour for her own marital gown. But, just because the majority of modern brides still follow her example, doesn’t mean you have to. In fact, it’s becoming more and more common for brides to choose a coloured gown, or at least one with coloured elements, be it a satin bow, an ombre design or a tulle underskirt. Plus, let’s not forget that colourful dresses have long been popular in other cultures, such as red dresses at Asian weddings. The bottom line is – if you would feel most comfortable wearing a gown in a hue picked straight from a rainbow, then that’s exactly what you should wear.
Weddings need cheesy music
There’s a bit of a myth around wedding music, which says cheesy numbers are the only kind that draw people to the dance floor. But as wedding DJs know, there’s a much better musical story to tell.
DJs that they all draw from the same playbook. One that’s heavy on cheesy numbers along the lines of Dancing Queen and Nutbush City Limits. The thinking – among many couples at least – is that it is these cheesy classics that will get people on the floor, but really good DJs know there’s a better musical story to tell. So yes, it’s nice to play one or two favourites, but a true professional can craft a more modern or even retro playlist that will still get the feet tapping. So give them your musts, give them your never and then give them permission to be creative, not cheesy. Chances are you won’t regret it.
if you have discussed the possibility of choosing a wedding DJ for your reception then it is highly likely that you have already had some judgemental looks and warnings about how they will play cheesy and dated music. That may have been par for the course in the past, but these days DJs have a much more modern library of tracks while still holding onto those golden oldies. Have a chat with your DJ and give them an idea of the kinds of music you want to hear. You can even make up a no-go list for things that you absolutely do not want played at your wedding!
You must offer reciprocal invites
This is a fairly old-fashioned belief rooted in wedding etiquette. If you have been invited to someone’s wedding then you may feel obligated to offer a return invite. If you are having a small wedding then this could bump up your numbers unnecessarily. In reality, the only people you really have to invite are those who you want to be there! Never feel obligated to offer an invite. It is best to simply state from the outset that due to space or budget restrictions you will only be inviting your closest friends and family.
You will be overwhelmed by tears at every opportunity
You have probably heard all sorts of stories that have led you to believe that you will be crying tears of joy when he proposes, when you try on the perfect dress, when you walk down the aisle, when you say I do and at numerous other moments. If you do then that’s fine, but if you don’t then that is fine too! Everyone reacts differently, so don’t take it as a bad omen if you don’t cry all the time!
You must be engaged for one year
Somewhere along the way, it seems to have been decided that a year is the ideal engagement length. There is no particular reason why this should be the case. If you want to get married within a couple of months of getting engaged then that is entirely up to you. This is often the case if one half of the couple is in the military and is awaiting deployment overseas. Other couples may end up engaged for years for a variety of reasons. You will know when the timing is right so trust your instinct.
Wedding planners are an unnecessary expense
People seem to believe that wedding planners are very expensive. However, this is not really the case. Hiring a wedding planner can really help to not only keep everything organized, but also to keep your budget on track. You may even find that a wedding planner can get you better deals with vendors that they work with on a regular basis. You may find that working with a wedding planner can actually save you money!
Wedding food is boring and tasteless
There was a time when a wedding dinner would consist of rubbery chicken, some kind of sauce and limp vegetables. However, nowadays caterers are coming up with much more creative menus. You can have any type of food that takes your fancy including curry, sliders or a traditional barbecue. Deserts can be equally as creative with sundae bars and the like to keep your guests and their taste buds very happy.
DIY is the cheapest way to arrange a wedding
When you are working on a tight budget, you may fall into the trap of thinking that DIY is going to save you lots of money. However, when you factor in the cost of the raw materials and the amount of time that you will need to spend on your projects then you may actually be spending as much as you would seeking out a good deal with a local professional. Unless you have the materials on hand anyway you might be better limiting your DIY to just one or two projects that will add some of your personality to the wedding rather than trying to do everything yourself to save money!
You need an equal number of bridesmaids and groomsmen
If one of you has more friends than the other you may end up feeling as though you have to enlist extra bodies to even up the numbers of bridesmaids and grooms-men However, there is no real reason why you need to have even numbers. It is more important that you include everyone that matters most to you both.
Your wedding needs to be expensive
There is no real reason to start your life together with unmanageable debts, so simply work out a realistic budget and stick to it. You can pick out a few splurge items like a designer dress or a special venue and then look for ways to save money on other areas of the wedding. For example, you will find that artificial flowers are less expensive than fresh ones and can look just as good. It is all about choosing what best suits your budget while still giving you the wedding of your dreams.
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