Help! I'm a bridesmaid but what do I do?

Help I am a bridesmaid but what do I do?

Being a bridesmaid can be confusing, after all, some end up doing lots for the wedding, while others need only turn up on the day looking gorgeous!

According to Sydney wedding planner Jessica Alvial, in order to be a great bridesmaid you must first grasp the fundamentals of a bridesmaid’s duties and the  different roles everyone has.

“The role of a bridesmaid is to support and assist the bride prior, during and just after the wedding,” says Jessica.

“A bridesmaid is the sounding board for any bride to  bounce off their ideas, worries and successes. It is a tough but rewarding gig!”

Deciding on the size of a bridal party and who to select is, on occasion, enough to make you want to elope, but if you can get past this you can get past anything.

It is a personal decision and no set rules apply. Some girls even have their best guy pal as their “Manmaid”.

Jessica says she was spared the trauma of choosing who to leave in and who to leave out since she has three sisters and a best friend and her husband had three best friends and one brother.

You can have as few or as many as you wish to reflect your style of wedding, the numbers on each side don’t even have to match. It’s your day and you can have it your way.

Some key responsibilities of a bridesmaid are:

•    Assisting the bride with the general planning of the wedding and helping out where and when needed
•    Remember how we touched on being a sounding board? That’s key. Be a good listener and a tower of strength since the bride will need good friends around her, sometimes only to listen.
•    You will more than likely be involved in the planning of the pre-wedding celebrations
•    You will be privy to the theme, style and finer details of the wedding day, so you better be good at keeping secrets
•    Organisation is key to being a success at this whole bridesmaid thing
•    Your role becomes categorically defined on the big day, it’s your turn to step up and support her, make sure she has everything she needs and assist the matron/maid of honour

There is a difference between being a Matron/Maid of Honur (Chief bridesmaid) and just being a bridesmaid. A bride strategically selects her wedding party, so, as a bridesmaid, you have all been chosen specifically.

Typically a best friend or a close relative is her Matron/Maid of Honour and has a key role in being her confidant, lead support person and generally knows the bride better than she knows her self. She will help carry the bride’s dress and, generally, assists the bride’s mother with helping her get the bride’s dress on. She’s also usually a witness on the marriage certificate as well. The bridesmaids, while just as important, share in assisting on the day and play a lesser part to a certain degree.

It’s important to remember that weddings are about emotion and you will get a sense of just how much you mean to the bride during the planning of the wedding, the lead up preparations and the actual wedding day. It’s a connection that will likely last long after the day is over. It’s typical that a small gift as a token of the bride and groom’s appreciation is given to the bridal party at the conclusion of the wedding or at a  get together soon after.

While there may be tears, tantrums, extreme highs and subsequent lows in being involved in someone’s wedding, being a bridesmaid is as enjoyable as you make it!

There are no set rules but if you know how to be a good friend, you’re 90 per cent of the way to being the best bridesmaid your bride could hope you to be!

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