Real groom: a gentleman’s guide to marriage

You know you can talk the talk – you did that with your marriage vows – but can you walk the walk? Can you put into practice that which you promised to do? This gentleman’s guide to marriage will help a husband to flourish in his marriage.

Fibs are forbidden

Marriage, or relationships in general are built on trust. By always being open and honest with your significant other, you build this trust. Even little white lies aren’t recommended. Unless of course you are talking about a new haircut!

Good old-fashioned manners

There are many famous tales of men making sacrifices for a lady. Sir Walter Raleigh was once said to have placed his expensive coat over a puddle so that Queen Elizabeth – that’s the first Queen Elizabeth – didn’t get her dainty feet wet. Whether this is fact or fiction is not the point. The point is gentlemanly behaviour can still be performed today. Holding a door for your loved one, seeing her safely into a car, giving her flowers without a specific reason – are all gentlemanly things you can do to express your love and respect.

Mark those dates

Make sure you remember those important dates! The two most important being your wedding anniversary and their birthday. If you have a habit of forgetting, set a reminder in your phone right now. It’s a mortal sin to forget your wedding anniversary!

Cheating is for chumps

This one goes without saying but we will mention it anyway. Remember what was said about trust earlier? Don’t be one of ‘those’ guys and always remember your marriage vows.

There doesn’t have to be a reason

Don’t think there has to be an occasion or reason to do something special for your spouse. Organise a dinner at a fancy restaurant, bring home some flowers, plan a romantic weekend away. Try and go above and beyond to show your appreciation. And make sure you tell them you love them and appreciate them regularly. Preferably every day!

Don’t be a slob

One of the quickest ways to disappoint your loved-one is to become a couch potato. Now that doesn’t mean you have to be active 24/7 and especially not when you’re at home. But lazing around when there are things you should be doing and ignoring the house work is a real turn-off. Do your best to be a helpful husband!

The little things mean a lot

Sometimes it’s the little things that help make you a great husband. Does your spouse hate making the bed? Why not take care of this every day without being asked. Is your partner really close with her parents? Make an effort to get to know them well and build a solid relationship with them. Making these types of efforts will go a long way to elevating you to hero-husband status.

Be the best back-up bloke

What is your spouse passionate about? Make sure you take an interest and really get behind them. Make an effort to learn about the things they love and lend your support. It will mean a lot knowing you are there to back them up and you truly care.

Avoid the rut and routine

Romance and excitement is usually at a high during the courting stage while things a new and fresh. And after the rings and vows are exchanged, it’s not uncommon for things to dip a little in this department. Don’t let this happen you. Make it your job to ensure there is always romance and excitement in your relationship and don’t let your relationship fall victim to routine. How this looks will depend on you as a couple, so try and remember the initial excitement of the early stages of your relationship and keep this burning.

Keep working

Probably the best advice for a married gentleman is to keep working on it. A good marriage is one where both partners don’t take the other for granted, always show respect for their each other, and follow the golden rule of doing to others as you would want them to do unto you. Good luck!