Posted in Wedding Expert Advice | 12 December, 2013
Please help! My groom refuses to participate in the wedding planning. He just wants to turn up on the day and even wants me to pick his clothes. What should I do?
Oh, dear! Unfortunately, you’re hardly the first bride to face this age-old dilemma.
Though traditionally brides have been expected to do most of the wedding planning, these days many grooms take great delight in helping plan their own wedding.
In fact, the last wedding I attended, the groom hand-drew the invitations, ceremony booklets and the images on the bomboniere, but that’s hardly a typical scenario.
Frankly, it seems logical that a groom would want at least some input into the wedding preparations. After all, it’s his big day, too.
Since you say your future husband is refusing to participate, it makes me wonder why.
Clearly, you have agreed to get married and have a certain type of wedding, so you’ve gotten that far. Perhaps your groom is just not a details-oriented bloke? Perhaps he doesn’t care what what flowers are in the centrepieces, what font is to be used on the invitations or even what colour his tie may be (if he even wants one)?
The good news is that, though he doesn’t seem terribly interested in the details of the wedding, he may be willing to help you with the fun stuff such as cake tasting or picking a band or DJ. And, that’s probably a win.
The best advice I can give you, besides plying your groom with cake samples, is to ask for his help and how much you want him to be a part of the planning of your big day.
Let him know how much it value you place on his input and how much it would mean to you to have your wedding wedding reflect the both of you.
Also, why not ask him why he’s not interested in helping with the preparations. You may be surprised and find that he just assumes that you’re thrilled to bits picking the shades and shapes of table scatters and what length dresses your bridesmaids should have.
Worse still, he may think that you don’t want his input. So, have the discussion and if he’s simply not interested in the process, muster the help of your bridesmaids and create your dream day exactly as you want it to be!
That’s what they’re there for, to help the bride in her wedding preparations.